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Wendy and I have put a priority on having read all of the last general conferences addresses together before the next conference. We, of course, read from the conference issue of the ENSIGN. Generally we do this while traveling in the car, she driving and me reading out loud. We stop at any point to discuss or comment on what we have just read in order to digest the material a little better. While in NC, traveling a lot, we usually finished a couple of months ahead of time.
With a little less driving required of us now, we announce that we finished reading all of the addresses including those from the General Relief Society Meeting, this morning as we drove to attend a session at the Provo temple. The very last talk was one of the best. It was by President Monson, entitled “Charity Never Faileth.”
He concluded with a very insightful definition of charity--“true charity is love in action.”
“Needed is the charity which refuses to find satisfaction in hearing or in repeating the reports of misfortunes that come to others, unless by so doing, the unfortunate one may be benefited... Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down. It is resisting the impulse to become offended easily. It is accepting weaknesses and shortcomings. It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others.”
So well stated. I hope I can live this commandment better.
We look forward to General Conference weekend. I wonder what the important themes and messages will be this time. We will be together as a family on Sunday evening at Matthew and Kim’s, to share our understandings of the things we heard. I hope that we can get some input, by phone, from Valerie’s and David’s families also.
The Soderquist remained here overnight, then in the morning, Alison and I worked on getting her started on taking over the computer files that contain our master family history records for the Evans side of our family.
JoAnn had worked quite a lot on this research and transferred her findings into a PAF database a few years ago, but this has not been updated since. Alison has the document file box that JoAnn left and now intends to go through that and make sure that all of the content of the source material it contains is incorporated into an Evans Master PAF file.
While we were together we added transcriptions of a couple of 1928 news articles about the death and funeral of Marion Keeth Benson which Valerie has just received from a Keeth relative, along with some other records I had found on these people in ancestry.com (census, burial).
There is really a lot that could be done to develop these records further as she and others get the time. Much of this would consist of gathering information already developed from other researchers, then sifting and incorporating it into our family master record. We know that there exist extensive additional records created by Jill Woodbury (on Keeth/Benson); a Barker lady (Averett/Mason). Apparently Chad Argyle has done some work on Evans family history. Ancestry.com is just full of family tree records on the Averett family and others, whose submitters could be contacted.
Another avenue that probably also should be pursued is generating (or gathering) biographies both for people long since gone and also for relatives currently living. Jill Woodbury has apparently created some extensive biographies in her work. Biographies really help to make family history live. Ideally the records for every person in our family history should include a biographical sketch, that contains something of the dynamics of a person’s life, what motivated them, what obstacles they overcame, what they accomplished, their strengths, etc. It sure is easier to write biographies on people that you know or knew personally. This would be the ideal time to write something about Grandma Gourley, Aunt Lois, Dan, Jane, etc.
A further objective might be to decide upon a course of action to coordinate and share information and findings. The time might be right to work jointly with Evans cousins on some of these things. Perhaps there might be some dividing up of responsibilities (research on specific lines, working on biographies, keeping records of current family members, gathering pictures, newsletter, publication, temple submissions,etc.)
We had lot of company last night and today. Most of the men and boys in the family here had gone for a hike-in overnighter to a yurt in the Uinta Mts. (I didn’t feel quite good enough to go to that.) Alison came down from South Weber with Rachel, Amy, and Christopher in the afternoon.
She helped me prune the little fruit trees we have in our back yard. Here is the nectarine tree after she finished. Doesn’t it look a little like a sheep after shearing?
For dinner we also had Emilie with Lindsey, Adam, Garrett, and Brandon, and Kimberly, with Alyssa, Megan, Erin, and Brianna with us. The guys were sure outnumbered.
Alison and Kimberly and all their girls (except for Brianna) then left us to attend a play at BYU (a version of Jane Austen’s PERSUASION). Emilie stayed until about 10 pm and the remaining grandkids played together. We had the luxury of having Emilie play the piano for us for a while. Also, part of the time she played accompaniment while I sang some solo pieces that I had worked on while taking voice lessons from Ralph Woodward while a young BYU student. I probably haven't these pieces for more than 50 years. There were some dramatic pieces like "Edward" and the Shubert's "The Erl King" and religious pieces, Chopin's "Christ Be With Me" and Gounod's "There Is A Green Hill". I was surprised that I still could sing most of them.
Look at the buds on the apricot tree starting to show "popcorn." We hope that the tree bides its time in coming to full blossom, to wait until these next storm systems pass, so that we will have some fruit from it this summer.
On Tuesday, Wendy and I took a trip to the Manti temple along with (Sister) Charlene Bloomgren, who was a records preservation missionary in Raleigh NC at the same time we were there on our mission. She was living in the Charlotte NC area when called on her mission, but has since come to Utah to help take care of a sister who was ill and is currently living in Orem.
It seems to us that the Manti temple is one of the jewels of all the temples, and is certainly one of our favorites. It is so extraordinarily pretty inside and out. The interior seems fresh and lovely yet has a pioneer flavor to it. I love the room with the Minerva Teichert mural.
After finishing our endowment session, we were able to have a temple worker take us to see some of the sealing rooms and also the two spiral staircases on the west end of the temple. These were constructed by pioneer craftsmen and circle up for six stories without center support.
Wendy and I were appalled to read a Deseret News article that reported a seeming unanimity among “scientific experts” that having children make persons less happy. (Studies say children subtract from happiness, so what do we really feel? Michael De Groote, Deseret News, Friday, March 18, 2011)
Statements by the author in the article included “Scientific studies have found that having children does not increase happiness. In fact, experts say it has the opposite effect. The more children you have the less happy you are” and “These results are confirmed across decades of research, with results published in 1957, 1970, 1975, 1978 and so on.” Several studies in scientific journals were summarized with none reported that contradicted these findings.
How could this be? Our experience in having our greatest joys come from our posterity seems so opposite.
We puzzled, “Is this conclusion really representative of all of the family research that has been conducted?” “Is this newsman really qualified to interpret the totality of research on this subject?” (In fairness to the author, he uses personal experiences with a sick child to perhaps raise doubts about the above study conclusions.) “How did the researchers define happiness?” “How did the average respondents define happiness?” Finally, “If these studies really validly describe attitudes in our society, what does this say about our society?”
This article has generated lots of reader comments (which I usually avoid), mostly along these lines:
“Marriage and family magnifies life. Before we had children, we were happy. Then children came along and my intense joy was higher than I ever thought it would be; but also, worry and sorrow were greater than I had ever known before. Being a parent is a tough job but after six children and 14 grandchildren, I'd do it again--just try to do a better job of it! The most intense joy I ever feel is with my children and grandchildren. Nothing else compares.”
“I will never regret having had children, only that I was not a better parent. My greatest joys and my greatest sorrows have revolved around my children. Maybe the problem is that the researchers are asking the wrong questions. Should they not be asking whether the joy has balanced with the sorrow; whether parents have become whole by giving life to and guiding another along in life?”
“Studies can be wrong - dead wrong. The first fallacy in these so-called studies is the presumption that the scientists can even "measure" happiness. Without a baseline, they can only pontificate on whether or not children "subtract" from our happiness. Happiness is a subjective thing, it is a sublime emotion, and it is rarely attributable to the moment in which we "feel" happy.”
“The people in this study don't know the difference between "happiness" and "joy".”
“If your definition of happiness only encompasses a selfish desire to satisfy yourself (have more money, spend more time on yourself, buy yourself nicer things, etc.), then I would agree that children definitely make you less happy. But if your definition of happiness is more unselfish, then children will bring you immense happiness.”
“I was single until I was 36, and then got an instant family--three stepchildren, and we had two more in two years. It has been hard work, but it has been worth it... The most serious problem I had when I was single was worrying about whether Captain Picard would be rescued from the Borg. Now I have a life. That's something these ivory-tower researchers don't seem to understand.”
“I wonder if the degree of satisfaction we derive from raising children is a function of the amount of real sacrifice of time and one-on one effort we make for our children.”
It is Sunday evening. We went to all of our Church meetings today, plus choir, plus I attended ward scouting committee. I think I am feeling a little better, and could take deep breaths without it hurting. I even made a joke today and teased Ross, a priest age young man who sits beside me in ward choir, about something. I think it was the first time I have felt like making a joke since about January.
Today was branch conference day in Mount Zion. We knew because of something June Owen had said in her Facebook. This was one of the highlight Sundays of the year, the day when the branch would put on a big feast for their stake visitors. (We were there for the last two branch conferences.) We got really homesick for Mount Zion today. This evening, we finally reached somebody from the branch by phone, the Shepards, and got a full report of the day’s activities. They had 140 in attendance (when will they become a ward?). Bro. Jeff had felt good enough to barbecue a pig for the conference meal (him feeling good enough to cook a pig is also good news). They have a new Stake President that the branch is “breaking in”, to quote Bro. Theron. Pres. Glue (spelling??) was just sustained last week and this is his first ward conference. We enjoyed hearing about the new Relief Society Presidency with wonderful counselors, Sister Judy and Sister Nancy, Bro. Daryl’s wedding, and also little update about Todd and Tabatha and the boys they may adopt.
I looked for the Chandlers in TV shots of the stands for the BYU-New Mexico game but never spotted them. They sure saw the game of a life time with Jimmer’s 52 point performance. I loved his intensity and that of the rest of the team. It was like they just willed the win. Lets hope for another game of a life time in the finals against San Diego State this evening.
I think that Jimmer is changing the face of local basketball. We watched three state high school basketball games and also saw a game of Joshua’s little team a few days ago. Relentless dribbling by little guards, in which they charge up the floor before the defense is set, penetrate, and try to score with a scoop shot lay-up. Sometimes they pass back out for a teammate three-pointer. Even in Joshua’s league, teammates were setting high picks to free their point guard to penetrate to the basket. It’s a different game. Fast-paced. It would have been fun to play this way.
We had two nice family home evenings Monday night. We did a Skype visit with David and family early in the evening. The highlight was getting a visual tour of their new house. It looks like it will be a nice place to live, also a blessing to the boys as a place with some space to grow in.
Speaking of Boston, the D-News has started to carry a weekly column in its car section by the PBS car repair personalities Click and Clack-the Magliozzi brothers. Today they were talking about how to get around the winter-time disadvantages of low profile times to a respondent from Boston. They recommended a second set of wheels with snow tires for winter driving, which he could wear on his car until the Boston Spring comes (in late June?? they said).
Later in the evening, we went to Matthew and Kim’s for their family home evening. They gave us a chance to report on our mission. It was fun to be there and feel the good spirit in their home.
In the aftermath of the pneumonia and flu I have had for the last few weeks, now I have a fun condition called pleurisy. For the uninitiated, this is an inflammation of the PLEURA, which is a double sac around the lungs and inside the rib cage. I got this diagnosis when I went back to the doctor Wednesday because I didn’t seem to be getting any better from my bout with the flu, etc., and my lungs felt like there was sandpaper in the linings. And coughing, which I was doing a lot of, and even breathing deeply, hurt to do. I am now back on high dosages of Ibuprofen for a week to reduce the inflammation and being real inactive, taking cough medicine when needed. I think I overdid my activity by going to our double temple shift Thursday and sure was sore that night. I have been mostly comfortable since then but have been doing everything at a very slow pace, taking more naps, mostly sitting or lying down. I can work at the computer, so I have continued to work on family research much of the day.
Here is the view as we left the Provo temple last Thursday afternoon, looking out over Utah Lake.
The family temple session on Saturday, Feb 26th was very sweet. (We have tried to do this each year near Michael’s birthday.) We went to the Ogden temple. Wendy and I went to the 2 pm endowment session. I saw Bruce as I came in, as he was working a mid-day temple shift. The family gathered for a 4 o’clock sealing session, Bruce and Angela, Quin and Alison, Matthew and Kim, along with Dorothy. We were able to do over 50 sealings–quite a few couples and some children to parents.
At one point, I felt quite a spiritual rush as we were doing sealings for some members of the Lewis family who had moved to the Palouse country of eastern Washington State. Significantly, as Wendy pointed out later, these same families (Robert Myra Lewis, Jay or Jenty King Lewis, Thomas Edward Lewis) were the subject of what I called “An Unusual temple experience” in our mission book, on 15 May 2009 (p. 152).
After the temple, we went back to Angela and Bruce’s place, where quite a few of the grandkids were. We had the usual menu. Alison had ordered a bunch of pizza from Domino’s. Wendy had made four cherry pies, and in the absence of Daniel and Paul, one was left over.
Sunday evening we took the leftover pie to the Blakes and then two pieces to Nathan and Gloria, so that they too could share in the remembrance.
I finished reading the Christmas present book Ka
rl Rove autobiography, COURAGE AND CONSEQUENCE. It was a long read with a lot of detail. It was quite interesting and enlightening, but also a little 
discouraging as it documented the history of many of our current political problems and the opportunism and lack of values in many prominant political figures. The book tended to reinforce my impressions that Pres Bush was a man of principle, that he told the truth about the presence of or attempts to acquire weapons of mass destruction by Iraq, that there was a lack of integrity on the part of many Democrat legislators who supported going into Iraq and then abandoned their positions for political advantage. There was also a chapter in which Rove did an assessment of Pres. Obama based upon the Bush administration’s dealings with him while he was a senator, that does not show Obama to an advantage.
I got back to our Thursday temple assignment the last two weeks and
also to church meetings. The pneumonia seemed to have cleared up, but I still have a leftover cough and still don’t feel 100%.
This past week was cabin week for us. We took it real easy, and had as many naps as we wanted. We came down Wednesday evening to prepare for our day at the temple Thursday and then went back up on Friday until Saturday night. I read a lot in the President Monson biography, did Sudokus, and we watched a lot of basketball (Jazz, BYU, state 4A and 5A playoffs). I got one more Guy Lewis family history file indexed.
Post high school college education has at least two purposes 1) to broaden us, make us better citizens and decision-makers, to live more meaningfully, etc., and 2) prepare us for working careers. For our young men, this education is crucial for their preparing to successfully fill their major Family Proclamation role of family provider, thereby contributing mightily to their own future happiness, the happiness of their spouse, and the growth and development of their children. For our young women, this education is equally significant, both to enable them to be a provider if circumstances require, and also as a partner in the family enterprise, homemaker, and nurturer of children.
There are many choices to be made regarding this post-high school preparation. Here are some things I have learned that might be helpful to the young people in this family:
1) Career preparation does not only occur in the college setting you receive as a young person. It is a life-long requirement. Most careers and professions are changing so fast (technological advancements, explosion of knowledge, etc.), that a person must be constantly renewing their knowledge to stay current in the field, let alone excel. Therefore most career learning takes place AFTER a person leaves higher education. A related truth is that many of us will not discover what we really want to do and what we will best best at until we have experienced a career for a number of years.
2) The majors and classes offered by universities and colleges are driven by what classes students choose, not necessarily by what will lead to good future employment or careers. Therefore, for their own protection and future, students need to have their own personal awareness and strategy, as they enroll in classes and commit to a major, as to what would be a useful career direction for themselves.
3) It seems to me that in selecting a field of study, persons need to get answers to two questions:
a) The current availability of jobs to graduates with this major, and
b) The range of options that the field has for a person to grow into a niche that might match their interests and capabilities. Hence, a critical objective for a student is to find a field of study, first, that has JOBS AVAILABLE and, second, that is BROAD ENOUGH TO ALLOW FLEXIBILITY FOR A PERSON TO GROW INTO THEIR POTENTIAL.
4) Many fields of college study simply do not offer very good prospects for future long-term remunerative employment. And, some are narrow and offer only limited options for a person to grow into a niche that matches their interests/capabilities.
5) One of the strengths of broader career paths, such as, business, education, nursing, medicine, law, social work, engineering, computer science, is that they each contain a variety of jobs that possess widely differing options for a range of worker interests, preferences, and capabilities.
For me, a useful concept is that both person interests/capabilities and job/career tasks can be represented on three dimensions that each scale from simple to complex. These dimensions are People (that, is interpersonal), Data (mental), and Things (physical). Some persons have a preference for working with people, others to analyze and conceptualize, others to work with their hands. For some it is a combination of these three focuses. Likewise, job tasks tend to emphasize one of these or to combine work with these in a variety of ways. Additionally, tasks and the skills to perform them range in complexity. In addition to personal preferences for the type and level of work, some people seem to have greater capacity to develop the highest level of skills in these various dimensions of work
For example, many jobs in the education field involve classroom teaching which requires a fairly high degree of both People and Data skills. Yet there is room in the field for persons who wants a greater emphasis on Data, as librarians, curriculum writers, researchers, etc. School administrative jobs balance People and Data skills slightly differently than for classroom instructors.
The field of law has court room lawyers on one end of the continuum (high People skill) and other jobs involving reading and analyzing case histories or writing opinions (high Data), and others balancing these dimensions.
I found a nice niche in social work, in program evaluation, strategic panning, research, and information system development that required Data skills that most social workers did not have, could not develop, and did not even want. Over time, I found that I had the ability to develop a set of skills unique for a social worker, that made my services be in demand and enabled me to work at interesting tasks and provide a secure and acceptable living for my family.
THE GOOD NEWS FROM THIS IS THAT MOST OF THE MAJOR, BROAD CAREER PATHS HAVE AMPLE OPPORTUNITY TO ACCOMMODATE PERSONS WITH ALMOST ANY SET OF INTERESTS/CAPABILITIES. In retrospect, I believe I could have found an interesting and successful niche for myself in several of the above fields.
Therefore, the challenge of choosing a direction in college work may not be so much in finding the perfect fit for your major–it is how to prepare to be able TO GET IN A DOOR TO START on a career path, in which options will be available that will become a good fit for you, your interests, abilities and needs. Which field you choose may not be so important.
When the spirit sons and daughters of God shouted for joy, because the earth was finished and ready to be inhabited, who shouted the loudest? Who was most excited?
Wendy and I were discussing the pre-mortal existence this morning as she worked on a lesson for this Sunday’s Relief Society, and we think we might know the answer. The daughters. Here is our reasoning.
Young men who have an understanding of the gospel generally look forward to having a family. I am recalling the many boards of review I have attended. The best-put-together boys, when asked about their life goals will typically say, in a matter-of-fact way, something like “I hope to be able to serve a mission, and attend college, and get a good job, and have a family.” On the other hand, many girls will say, with great feeling (like both JoAnn and Wendy have said): “All I ever wanted to be was a mother.”
We can imagine when preparing to come to this world, that the best of the sons of God might have said, “I would like to be a leader for the Lord and help him with his work.” The daughters would cry, “Now I can be a mother!”
With a feeling of humble gratitude, I acknowledge the tender mercies of our Heavenly Father, who has so quickly granted our family the intent of our recent fasting and prayers. Heidi's visa to enter Spain did come so that she has been able to travel to her mission field according to the original schedule. And Garrett seems to have hit it off with his new speech therapist and the work of helping him with his speech seems to be still progressing.
I also am grateful for the faith and prayers of members of our family. I hope that we can continue to unite both in giving thanks to our Father for his goodness to us, and in calling upon him for needed blessings. Perhaps he will be inclined to grant future petitions when we acknowledge and express gratitude for his hand in our lives and when he knows that we care about certain matters, following the lesson of the Savior’s parable of the importuning widow (Luke 18:1-8-- Painting: Parable of the Unjust Judge, by John Everett Malais (1863)).
I have been lying pretty low for the last 10 days. I started with a cold about Tuesday last week. I thought I was starting to get better on the weekend, but still didn’t feel very good. Sunday night I noticed some crackles in my breathing. On Monday, we got to Dr.Gale, who said I had pneumonia. He gave me an antibiotic and told me to take it easy and that I should be starting to feel better by toward the end of the week. I think I am a little better and most of the congestion is gone.
I have missed two Thursdays at the temple, Church meetings last Sunday, Round Table, and several family things. When I have felt up to it, I have been working away at fami
ly history.
I did have a nice family history moment this past weekend. I found a 1998 obituary in the Charleston WV Gazette, for Dr. Jack Geary Robertson, who was a Clendennin WV dentist, and a distant cousin (Earrie Robertson, Alvin Benton Robertson, George Washington Robertson, James Carson Robertson and his wife Mary Lewis, John Lewis, our ancestor). Something jumped out at me in the write-up. One of his sons, John Benton Robertson, was said to be living in Springville, UT. I was able to look up Jack Geary Robertson in New Family Search and found that his baptism and endowment were performed in the Provo Temple on 14 Oct 1999, EXACTLY one year to the day after he had died.
So, I naturally assumed that we had a distant cousin living among us who is a member of the Church. Using Public Directories and White Pages I found a Springville address and phone, and the first name of his wife, Aleen. The house was in the Springville Hobble Creek bottoms just east of SHS and not more than 6 or 7 blocks from where David and Rebecca lived. However, the phone had been disconnected, with no current Springville listing. On a hunch, from the White Pages which documented that they had lived in Provo, Orem, Springville, and Riverton, I grabbed a Salt Lake phone directory and found a number for John B and Aleen Robertson in Riverton. I called and got John and he turned out to be THE John Benton Robertson I was trying to connect to. He had an interesting history. He was a convert to the Church at age 21 while going to college at West Virginia University. A year later, he went on a mission to Chile. He eventually found Aleen at BYU. They have four children, and the oldest has just received a mission call. John is currently serving on the High Council in his stake. He has done quite lot of family history work on the Robertsons, including spending a lot of time with older members of his family taking notes. (These things he dutifuly recorded in the Notes section of his PAF record which he shared with me.)
I was excited to get answers to several questions I have had about the family and about the area of West Virginia in which they lived. I learned a few unsavory things about certain family members, that I had suspected but perhaps really didn't want to know. And, I can pronounce Kanawha (the county in which Charleston is located) like a native. They say “k’NAW”.This part of the family was really quite high achieving--lots of Doctors and lawyers, successful business-men, Ph.Ds, Baptist and Methodist ministers, etc.
Today is Jeron’s 16th birthday, and it marks a sort of a little milestone for me. In March 2005, I happened to identify a CD with some money in it and began to use it to give some money to each grandchild at their birthday time, for them to save for missions and/or college. There was just enough money in the CD so that I was able to give $500 to each child on their birthdays that year. Sometime during that year, I made the determination that I was going give a total of $1000 to each grandchild. After the year was over, we have continued to give $100 each birthday. On the birthday when one of the older grandkids reached age 18, we gave them the reminder of the $1000. We have given grandkids born after March 2005 $100 on each of their birthdays this far.
The milestone is that Jaron is the last of the 29 grandkids born before March 2005 who got the original $500 gift. So for these grandkids, we have finished the commitment we made. We will start to do something else for their birthdays.
Somehow this reminds me of the $25 US savings bond that my parents purchased in my name when I was a little boy. It was to help me with college expenses. Knowing that such a fund existed helped fix my mind on going to college. Late in the Spring of my first year at BYU, when I ran short of money, I wrote my mother asking that they cash in the bond and put the money in my checking account (the account was in the White Salmon bank). Somehow I discovered during the time I was home that summer that they hadn’t cashed in the bond at all. They thought that I might need the money more next year. I think that this repeated itself the next year also. That little savings bond was just like the widow’s meal oil that sustained Elijah and never was able to be used up. Most important, it symbolized to me my parents desires and commitment that I get an education and make something of myself.
Times and money amounts are different and the $25 was probably harder for my parents to come by that any money we have given to our grandkids for their birthdays. But the hope and the love is the same.
I recall my mother once saying, with an unusual sense of humor, that one of the blessings of her life was the ability to sit down beside a large pile of work and read a book. She read everything that came across her life–the Portland Oregonian, any Church book, scriptures, books on politics and American history. She had a special interest in and had read dozens of books on Washington (that is, the State) history. She was in some kind of women’s reading club, and she regularly ordered books by mail from a State library. She always had some kind of reading project that she was working on.
I observe that our family has several members who have inherited her reading gene.
I am grateful for gift of five books from family this past Christmas. I am trying valiantly to use these gifts fully and well.
I recently found this great statement by President Monson recognizing the essential importance of families:
“When we have sampled much and have wandered far and have seen how fleeting and sometimes superficial a lot of the world is, our gratitude grows for the privilege of being part of something we can count on–home and family and the loyalty of loved ones. We come to know what it means to be bound together by duty, by respect, by belonging. We learn that nothing can fully take the place of the blessed relationship of family life.” (TO THE RESCUE, p. 33)
(Isaiah 58:6-7)
Over the last few weeks, I discussed with family members an inspiring idea mentioned in my High Priests meeting a few weeks ago as we studied the subject of fasting. This is that each month prior to the regular Church Fast Sunday, we communicate by e-mail about matters that might be important subjects for our family to fast about. Then each family makes sure that they fast purposefully for these (and any other personal family items) by 1) dedicating their fast together in prayer at the start of the fasting period, 2) continuing to pray individually and in the family for these items over the course of the fast, and finally 3) praying for these items together just prior to breaking the fast.
We followed this process. I sent an initial e-mail out to our family on January 30th, a week before most of us have Fast Sunday, asking for subjects for a family fast. Then on Thursday Feb 3rd I sent a follow-up e-mail drawn from family responses:
“As I mentioned earlier, one thing that we are praying for, and will fast for, is help with Heidi's visa to enter Spain. Currently they are having trouble getting visas approved and missionaries are having to go stateside or to alternate missions for at least 1 month before a visa is approved. So, we are praying such that if it be the Lord's will, Heidi's visa will come soon so she can enter Spain as originally planned. Thanks, Quin”
“We thought it might be nice for people to remember Garrett. He is doing so much better with his speech, but maybe we could fast that he will be cooperative and work hard with the new therapist he will start with soon. This is a nice idea, Dad. Em”
I have checked back with most of the family, and everyone I talked to had good experiences with the fast. Some families said that this family process gave them incentive do things they had not done consistently, such as gather the family together on Saturday to dedicate their fasting. Some of the grandchildren did a better job of not eating during this period. Joshua went a full 24 hours for the first time (and did it voluntarily without prompting). He told his dad that he had learned that if you keep busy, you don’t notice that you are hungry.
For Wendy and me, it was a sweet and satisfying experience. At our age and conditions, it is easy to let fasting slip by. Wendy has this pre-diabetic condition where she gets shaky if she goes without food. I have been struggling with some stomach irritation. Also, we both have meds every morning that are supposed to be taken with food. But, inspired by the rest of you, we made fasting work this time, without any negative effects. We dedicated our fast Saturday evening and went a full 24 hours, and had a sweet prayer time at the end. It was inspiring to us to consider that in our homes, all across this country, prayers were being offered and faith exercised unitedly by members of our family, and especially by our grandchildren. It is hard to put in words the meaningfulness to us of this latter connection–that in Boston and Arkansas and South Weber and Utah County, our families and especially our grandchildren are uniting at the same time in the same prayer for particular needs of family members.
Congratulations go to Ryan who has just completed his Eagle board of review (Jan 29th), Justin who passed his First Class board of review (Jan 23rd) and Jonathan who has now become a scout.
I was amused at Jonathan when he was visiting here, holding the smaller boys spell-bound telling scout jokes.
We have had several nice family times in the last couple of weeks. We have tried to be available to give Emilie some extra support. Twice we took Garrett to his speech therapy play group in Salem. This is an hour in a program for under threeish children who need help with their speech. The staff were several very supportive ladies. They made us a part of the program as we helped Garrett make items to take home. Garrett was 
impressively cooperative and attentive with the whole program. A week ago, they were working on the sssssss sound and helping him to “hide his tongue” in order to say the sound. He was getting it quite a lot, b
ut had to be prompted sometimes.
We had Alison, Heidi, Jonathan, Aaron, and Christopher here for about 24 hours starting Friday afternoon. (Quin and Eric were at Klondike Derby.) The boys stayed with us and played while Alison and Heidi went shopping for missionary clothes and then to a dance concert at BYU. All of the Blakes also came for dinner and Ethan, Lindsay, and Adam stayed on overnight. Early in the morning Heidi went to a Provo temple session with one of her roommates who also has a mission call. It was fun to have these people here.
We s
pent Sunday with the Soderquists for Heidi’s talk in their sacrament meeting. We picked up Nathan on our way (Gloria was sick and stayed home). Heidi was wonderful and enthusiastic in here talk. Besides us, attending were Matthew and Kim and family, Scott and Emilie and family, Angela and Bruce and family including Staci who had come up from Provo, Andrew and Britain, Dorothy, Jeree, Kris and David, and Leroy and LePriel Soderquist with Aunt Greta, and also Quins sister ShariLynn and family, along with other friends of Heidi’s. Most all of this group also came over to the house after church.
I went to Dr. Carter, my cardiolgist, yesterday, and he discontinued my having to take Plavix. Hurray! I am relieved to not have the bleeding and bruising anymore that seemed to come with that medication. I am feeling better in other ways, too. My episode with heartburn, that was problematic during the holidays seems to be lessening, and I am learning how to control and prevent it better (don't eat so much, so fast; quit eating after dinner; avoid spicy foods). I have felt able to exercise on the treadmill several times in the last few days, walking for about 20 minutes and expect to gradually pick up the speed and length in the next weeks.
Pictures: Display that expresses our feelings, Wendy holding Brandon Lewis Blake age 26 days, Blake kids twice (notice how Justin can continue reading the paper with no interruption--how Lewis-like--he comes from a fine tradition), Heidi with new mission clothes, Quin and Alison with Heidi at the family gathering on Sunday
Home teacher
Two families. My companion is Alyssa's friend Michael.
Provo temple ordinance worker
Wendy and I serve on the first two shifts on Thursdays. For the first one, we need to be at the temple for the preparation meeting at 6:20 am. We get up about 5 am and try to be ready to leave our house by 5:40 am. Its about a 20 minute drive, so that gives us time to get dressed and be a minute early for the meeting. On the first shift lately, the leaders have been asking me to cover various “lines” where other workers are sick or missing. On a couple recent mornings I have had the assignment to work for awhile with a new trainee, which was enjoyable. In the afternoon I have a regular assignment to be the lunch back-up for the two endowment room coordinators, and after that officiate at the 1:40 endowment session. Wendy has also been assigned to that session, which makes it more fun. We sometimes serve at the witness couple for that session if there is no married couple who can do it.
Stakehouse scheduler
Our Bishop Voorhees is the agent bishop this year and asked me to be the building (stakehouse) scheduler for 2011. It has taken some thought to be able to find an effective way to record and organize this work. I am doing it manually and think I am starting to be on top of the schedule. And it is sort of fun to talk to the prople who call, and try to be helpful for their needs. Our stake leaders have made it clear that “calendaring isn’t scheduling,” so that when wards or organizations build a calendar they should not assume that they have rooms in the stake building until they have “scheduled” the locations they need with me. The Church, on lds.org, is in the process of rolling out a new calendaring/scheduling system, but it seems to me that the current release does not support the scheduling aspect in a very helpful way yet. IF ANYONE IN THE FAMILY KNOWS HOW TO MAKE SCHEDULING WORK ON THE ON-LINE CALENDARING SYSTEM, PLEASE LET ME KNOW.
Unit Commissioner to the 12trh ward/member of Stake Aaronic Priesthood Committee
Ward Scouting Committee Advancement Chair
Right now I am working on a project to reestablish a significant group of ward merit badge counselors. This includes a need for some recruitment and training (orientation and youth protection) to be done in our ward, with the cooperation and approval of the district training staff.
I keep plodding along on Lewis family history. I am still working on the descendants of Mary Adline “Polly” Lewis, who married James C. Robertson. Most of this family is still in West Virginia, where Mary and James moved in the 1840s.
I seem to be working in the opposite direction from most people (and quite a few people ARE working on their family history.) I am coming forward from early ancestors–almost everyone else is starting with themselves and trying to work back. Sometimes we meet in the middle. I have a pretty good handle on the families of James and Mary, their children and grandchildren. Now I am taking each grandchild with their spouse and trying to bring the information forward as close as I can get to the present. James and Mary had 7 children and at least 59 grandchildren. These grandchildren were born between 1866 and about 1900. Between Ancestry.com and West Virginia vital records, the information is quite good. Ancestry is very good on census, military, and Social Security death records, plus submitted family trees give lots of clues about marriages and family composition. Sometimes I find a recent obituary. West Virginia vital records include births, marriages, and death certificates. I am guessing that I am about half-way through detailing the descendants of the grandchildren. Just last evening I finished working on the family of Nancy Jane Robertson Canterbury who was the second oldest child (of 9) of George Washington Robertson, the 3rd child (of 7) of James and Mary.
I work in three steps. First, I copy everything I find about the family (direct descendants, spouses, and spouses’ parents) into a WordPerfect document. This is the actual content of a record in addition to the source. The document file for the family of Nancy Jane has 64 pages. Second, I create PAF records for all of these people, including their pedigree/family group information, but also adding actual source content as Notes. When it is needed, I also write explanations for my conclusions or summarize my findings about a person as a part of the Notes for that individual. In my recent research, I was able to add 74 names to our PAF record for persons from Nancy Jane’s family. The third step is to enter the information about these persons in this family who meet the criteria for temple work into New Family Search. (I usually don’t submit names of persons who were born after the year 1900.) Often the entry work takes the form of adding to information already present, making corrections, or combining duplicate records. I reserve all temple work that is yet needed for these persons and get the cards printed. In the case of Mary Jane’s family, I found temple work that needed to be performed for 6 men, 12 women, and 9 couples. It took me about three weeks to do this for Nancy Jane’s family.
Some of the personal information contained in these records is interesting, uplifting, depressing, etc. Two infants died of malnutrition and two husbands of descendants shot themselves (one was ruled an accident). Then there was a couple who had split up, who each reported to the census taker that they were widowed. However, death records show that they both were still living. On the happier side, there was a loving obituary write-up for a women with several children and 17 grandchildren where it was said that she made everyone feel special, but the truth was that “it was she that was special.”
I am still hoping by summer to have my Lewis research to the point of being able to publish a book along the order of the Agee book. (Picture: headstone in the Bob Canterbury Cemetery, Roane Co., WV, for a grandson, Bobby Ransan Canterbury)
President Danny Henderson of the Mount Zion Branch just contacted us, about what advice I gave to a couple when, as a Bishop, I performed their marriage. I performed about a dozen marriages while Bishop. Here is what I typically said before performing the actual ceremony (sometimes I also gave the couple a written copy of this advice)---
What we are doing here today in creating a marriage is important. Married people live longer. Married people are more successful in their lives and careers. Married people report greater happiness than unmarried people. Even more important, when children are raised together by a happily married couple, they stand the best chance of growing up happy, well-adjusted, and successful. My wife JoAnn and I have been married almost 38 years. We know something of the ups and downs of married life. I would like to draw upon my own experience and suggest six ways to keep your marriage bond strong:
1. When you build up your partner, you help yourself. Love comes and love stays when you treat your partner in a loving way. I do not believe that we fall in or out of love--we grow in love and stay in love IF we treat our partner in a loving way. It’s the way we treat our partner that determines how we feel about our partner. There is absolutely no place for grouchiness, unkindness, yelling, browbeating, or any kind of abuse. When we are in our homes and with our family, we need to live the Golden Rule--our Lord’s recipe for successful relationships: ”Do unto others as you would have done unto you.” When you build up your partner, you help yourself to be happier and keep yourself in love.
2. When your partner is acting their worst, they need your strength and your love the most. Everyone has good moments and bad moments. A smart husband or wife is sensitive to the times when their spouse is not at their best, then makes a special effort to be up-beat, loving, patient, and supportive. This evens out the highs and lows and makes for a more positive family life. When your partner is acting their worst, they need you to be extra strong and loving.
3. If things aren’t going right, change yourself. Many marriages have been wrecked by one of the partners being too anxious to change the other. That just doesn’t work. YOU can only control what YOU do, and feel, and think. If the time comes when things in your marriage relationship aren’t going right, change yourself.
4. “I only have eyes for you.” When we were unattached and fancy free, we could be interested romantically in many people. Marriage requires us to focus all of our romantic interest in our spouse. Strong marriages are based on trust. I absolutely trust my wife to be faithful to me and the marriage vows we made. She has lived to earn my trust. I too have disciplined myself to be only attracted to her. With absolute faithfulness and trust, marriages stay strong, and provide a supportive foundation for the success of each of the partners and happiness and development of children. Now that you are making marriage vows, I urge you to only have eyes for each other.
5. As individuals, never, never, never give up on the promises you are each making today. In society today, there are influences that make it easy for persons to rationalize giving up on a marriage. All marriages have challenging times. The difference in whether a couple succeeds in their marriage may be as a simple as each of the pair refusing, no matter what, to break the marriage promises the individual made. I hope that each of your will resolve to yourself, “I can’t control what anyone else will do. But as for me, I am a person of my word. I promised and I will never, never, never go back on that promise.”
6. The strongest marriages take on God as a partner. Marriages succeed best when each spouse has their own strong moral compass, when the couple shares a deep-felt religious conviction, and when each spouse understands their marriage vow as a sacred covenant, not just made with each other but also involving God as a third partner in the marriage. I urge you to add strength to your marriage by making sure that God is a full partner in your relationship. I pray that He will bless you to this end.
Bishop Robert E. Lewis
Taylorsville Gardens 1st Ward
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
April 16, 2003
The Deseret News recently reported that “Mormon Mommy” bloggers are being read with interest by a surprising group of non-LDS women (“Mormon 'mommy blogs' getting noticed” by Sara Israelsen-Hartley, Religion News, January 18, 2011; see the origInal article by Emily Matchar “Why I can't stop reading Mormon housewife blogs--I'm a young, feminist atheist who can't bake a cupcake. Why am I addicted to the shiny, happy lives of these women?” http://www.salon.com/life/internet_culture/index.html?story=/mwt/feature/2011/01/15/feminist_obsessed_with_mormon_blogs).
Matchar reports that she and several friends and other women obsessively do a daily read of blogs by “Mormon Mommy” bloggers.
“Their lives are nothing like mine -- I'm your standard-issue late-20-something childless overeducated atheist feminist -- yet I'm completely obsessed with their blogs. On an average day, I'll skim through a half-dozen Mormon blogs, looking at Polaroids of dogs in raincoats or kids in bow ties, reading gratitude lists, admiring sewing projects.
“I'm not alone, either. Two of my closest friends -- both chronically overworked Ph.D. candidates -- procrastinate for hours poring over Nat the Fat Rat or C. Jane Enjoy It. A recent discussion of Mormonism on the blog Jezebel unleashed a waterfall of confessions in the comments section from other young non-religious women similarly riveted by the shiny, happy domestic lives of their Latter-day Saint sisters.
“"They have lovely homes, picture-perfect kids, loving, super-attentive husbands, and things seem very normal and calm," writes a commenter named BrookeD, who admits to reading five Mormon blogs daily.
“"I thought I was the only one!!" responds another commenter.
“"THANK YOU," adds a third. "I'm another closet non-Mormon reader of Mormon mommy blogs."”
Matchar tries to be analytical, objective, and even critical, but still has a strong emotionally fascination that she has a hard time explaining.
“But the basic messages expressed in these blogs -- family is wonderful, life is meant to be enjoyed, celebrate the small things -- are still lovely. And if they help women like me envision a life in which marriage and motherhood could potentially be something other than a miserable, soul-destroying trap, I say, "Right on." I won't be inviting the missionaries inside for hot cocoa now or ever, but I don't plan on stopping my blog habit any time soon.”
HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS ATTRACTION? I know I love to read the blogs belonging to the Mormon Mommies in our Lewis family.
Wendy spent a few days in Newport Beach CA with her faithful girlfriends. She left on Wednesday Jan 5th and got back on Tuesday Jan 11th. They went to one temple session at the Newport Beach temple, toured around, went out to eat several times, and did a lot of visiting. The weather was mild, without the rain that had been so heavy earlier. Here is a picture she took of a beautiful sunset looking out over the Pacific.
While she was gone I had some time to work on Lewis family history. I have been trying to document the descendants of Mary Lewis, a sister of our ancestor William Lewis, and her husband James C. Robertson, who was also a brother of William’s wife, Sarah. The Robertsons moved from Floyd/Patrick county Virginia, to the area of Charleston, Virginia, now West Virginia in the late 1840s and have mostly stayed in that area. They had large families and I have been gathering data about their descendants for about a year now, with the end not really in sight yet. This morning I finished the entry work in PAF of information I had gathered about the descendants of McClelland Erman Canterbury, born 1891, the 5th child Nancy Jane Robertson, born 1869 who was the 2nd child of George Washington Robertson, the 3rd child of James C and Mary.
A couple of my impressions are 1) there is an ever-increasing amount of family history information available on the web:
–Ancestry.com adds new records all the time
–An increasing number of persons are submitting their own family information to ancestry.
–Other web resources are being added, for example in the last few months the State of West Virginia has created a website to display their Vital Records, that is, births, marriages, deaths. This has really enhanced my West Virginia Robertson efforts.
–New family Search has made the search of temple and other Church family history records much more coherent and accessible
2) A lot of the temple work has already been completed for people I am researching. I try to clear names as I enter data about individual families into PAF. I find myself in sort of a gleaning and cleaning mode. Most families in which persons were born prior to about 1900 (this is a sort of cut-off for being able to submit names for temple work) have at least part of the temple work already completed. I mostly make corrections, pick up stragglers, and fill in gaps. Sometimes it is sealings that are yet undone, other times extraction has done the sealings or baptisms leaving other missing ordinances. Or part of a family needs ordinances while some members have their work fully completed. It also appears that the earlier that persons lived, the more likely that their temple work has been completed.
On Sunday, January 9th, I participated for the second week in row in the priesthood ordination of a grandson. This time it was Justin being ordained a Deacon. They did this ordination at Emilie and Scott’s home, because of the new baby. The Bishopric made quite a production of this (in a good way). The Bishops counselor conducted this as a service. Also present was the Bishop himself, the YM 2nd counselor/Scoutmaster and the Deacons President. After an opening prayer, the latter two did a sort of orientation as to the responsibilities of a Deacon. Then they asked me and Emilie for testimonies, and the Bishop also did a sort of welcoming testimony. Finally came the ordination. The whole business made me (and also Justin I assume) feel impressed with the importance that the ward leaders place upon the priesthood and its young men and their efforts and commitment to help the young men to feel wanted in the priesthood. I have had some more interaction with Justin lately and am impressed with his desire to do what is right and how much he is growing and maturing. I am glad that he is in a ward that cares deeply about its young men.
I am working on a project to recertify MB counselors in our ward. We have about 35 persons in the ward who we list as merit badge counselors, but they need to be reregistered. BSA (and maybe also our Council and District) has added requirements, that these persons need to be formally trained in their role, that they must complete scouting’s Youth Protection Training, and that they must submit a signed application (to allow BSA to do a BCI (Bureau of Criminal Identification) check. I attended a training session for Merit Badge Counselors at Round Table last Thursday evening, with the idea that we will do the training of our MB Counselors ourselves in our ward.
The last Monday while Wendy was gone, I went to Ogden and visited my sister Dorothy, staying overnight, then picking Wendy up at the Salt Lake airport Tuesday evening on my way home. Dorothy and I talked a lot about genealogy, worked together on the Guy Lewis records table of contents project, and solved a lot of this country’s political problems.
My assignments yesterday at the Provo Temple gave me lots of times to reflect and to study the scriptures. A memory of the Ammon League came back to me, from the days when our children were all still home. The Ammon League was made up of persons (namely, myself, Alison, Angela, Valerie, Matthew, and Emilie) who were pledged, like Ammon and his brethren, to wax “strong in the knowledge of the truth,” to search “the scriptures diligently that they might know the word of God.” We hoped that through this study and through “much prayer and fasting [that we might have the] spirit of prophecy, and the spirit of revelation, and when [we] taught, [we would teach] with power and authority of God.” (Alma 17:2-3)
In the Ammon League, along with its junior auxiliary Enos’s Eagles (myself, Michael and David, as I recall), we studied the scriptures together on a number of Sunday afternoons. As I thought about this bit of this family lore, I concluded that all members of the Ammon League have remained true to their pledges, and we still “rejoice exceedingly to see” each other, and what adds more to our joy, we each are still "brothers and sisters in the Lord," along with many others we have since added to our fold (Alma 17:2).
Our exemplar, Ammon, was a model of faithfulness, after his conversion. Here are some of the highlights of his exceptional life from the triple combination Index:
• angel appears to A.
• begins preaching the word of God
• with brethren, travels throughout the land
• desires mission to Lamanites
• refuses to be king
• chief among the missionaries
• taken bound to Lamoni
• becomes servant
• saves the king’s flocks
• discerns king’s thoughts
• teaches king
• thanks God, overpowered with joy
• cannot be slain
• ministers to people
• organizes church
• frees brethren from prison
• A’s converts never fall away
• leads his people toward Zarahemla
• is swallowed up in joy
• is provided for through faith
• is a man of God
• A’s faith wrought miracle
I invite comments with recollections of the Ammon League by its members.
We traded in our Town & Country on a new car yesterday. Its a 2010 Chevvie Traverse, a crossover, with 6 seat belts for grandchildren (plus 2 for us), all wheel drive for safety and traction in the snow and ice, fold down seats, roomy back. and many other nice feature. It has a really nice, solid, comfortable big-car feel to it as we have driven it.
The car has 14,000 miles on it and formerly was a Hertz rental car, so we paid some 12-15 thousand less than if brand new. We will miss the Chrysler however--it was a faithful friend. It had almost 187,000 miles on it. Over 90,000 were ours including the 40,000 for our mission.
We drove the Traverse to SCL this morning to take Wendy to the airport. She is going to spend 6 days in California with her close girl friends. These are the ones who stuck by her and were so supportive through the tough years she had. They will stay in a condo in Newport Beach, owned by one of the ladies, Leslie, and her husband. I guess I will make my time pass until next Tuesday by concentrating on family history.
I got some over-the-counter meds (and also advice from Dorothy who is expert) that have greatly the reduced the heartburn problem.
We had the Blake kids over Saturday night and took them to their ward meetings Sunday 11-2. Emilie had a very early appointment on Sunday morning to have her baby (C-section). Brandon Lewis Blake was delivered at 8:02 
am, 8 lbs 8 oz, 21 1/2 inches. I was relieved that everything went well in the birth and grateful for another handsome grandson.
Justin was recognized and graduated from Primary this day.
Immediately after church we drove everyone over to Mapleton to be a part of Jeremy being ordained a deacon. I am sure proud of Jeremy for preparing himself well for the priesthood and Matthew for such a super job with the ordination.
Later, we took the Blake kids over to Payson to meet their new brother.
Wendy and I have put a priority on having read all of the last general conferences addresses together before the next conference. We, of course, read from the conference issue of the ENSIGN. Generally we do this while traveling in the car, she driving and me reading out loud. We stop at any point to discuss or comment on what we have just read in order to digest the material a little better. While in NC, traveling a lot, we usually finished a couple of months ahead of time. 
