All Bets Are Off

    As a young boy, I somehow reached the conclusion, probably from my mother, that betting was wrong.  Betting is of course when one wagers some money or possession on the outcome of a game or the correctness of an issue.  People are supposed to earn their way in this world by true effort and good deeds.  From an early age, I only allowed myself to engage in a so called “Gentlemans’s Bet” wherein it was agreed that an outcome did not result in any change in some possession.
    I recall a time as a schoolboy when one Spring playing marbles became the major recess pastime.  Although I could shoot these shiney glass objects pretty well and having a big collection seemed admirable, I would not enter into any contest where “keepsies” was involved, that is where the winner got to keep anyones’ marbles that they shot out of the ring.  
    At a broader level at one time there seemed to be a cultural prohibition against sport-related betting, relating back to the example of the Chicago Black Sox scandal, This is where a prominent and talented baseball player, Joe Jackson and eight others, were banned for life from playing in the majors.  They were accused of losing the 1919 World Series against the Cincinnati Reds on purpose in exchange for money from a gambling syndicate led by an organized crime figure.  This gambling intrusion distracted from the purity and fairness of the competition and was thought by baseball leaders and also probably the majority of citizens to detract from the purity and enjoyment of America’s favorite pastime.
    In my own value development I came to see any material earthly resource as ultimately belonging to Heavenly Father, with myself as a steward of these gifts, and generally if not earned by my own effort is not a worthy acquisition.  Seemingly, this prohibited trying to add to my possessions through any kind of gambling.
    And anyway, responding to organized gambling is a very bad bet.  How much of the money that is wagered with gambling sponsors is returned to the betters?  Obviously less than 100% because the costs of running the organization is an administrative overhead expense that has to be subtracted from the amount of total amount of money involved in the betting transaction and available to pay off the winners.  Thus the whole gambling transaction has to be set up in a way that on the average of something like only 90% or 80% or maybe even less of the original amount wagered can be returned as payoffs.  While there may be higher payoffs to some at some point, that law of averages dictates eventually that most gamblers will be losers.
    Regarding sports betting, I am troubled and concerned that the leaders of major sports leagues in this country have opened a Pandora’s box of potential troubles.  In recent months, they seemed to have made Las Vegas and betting an integral part of being a fan of their teams and openly advertise sports-betting on their broadcasts of games on national TV.  I hope that in our family, we can continue to love and support good, clean sports competition but also fully avoid the corrupting trap of sports betting.

Temple and Family History Organization in a Ward and Stake

Problem
    Volunteering and serving as a consultant at a FamilySearch Center and serving as a ward family history consultant for a number of years has given me a perspective from which I have determined that some major difficulties exist in many wards and stakes in our response to the mandate to perform temple and family history work.  While the sample of my experience may be somewhat limited, yet as I interact with a number of individuals who have ward and stake callings in regard to this work, and I hear of their struggles and see recurring patterns that seem to be problematic.
    It appears that general membership of the Church may not fully understand the new and greater responsibilities placed upon Elders Quorum and Relief Society presidencies by the Church, to provide the primary ward leadership for temple and family history work (Handbook 25.2.2).  There may be a tendency to continue to look instead to the ward Bishopric for leadership and specific direction for temple and family history efforts in the ward.  Secondly, individuals who occupy Elders and Relief Society functions that affect temple and history work may not fully understand the importance of their roles and responsibility to provide leadership for temple and family history matters.  While in some respects, we all are responsible for every facet and feature of the work of the Lord, there have been recent changes in the degree of responsibility in the ward organization.  One change is that the direct responsibility and supervision by the ward Bishop and Bishopric for certain Melchizedek Priesthood functions has been reduced, for matters relating to temple and family history work (and similarly missionary work).  With the creation of a single Melchizedek Priesthood organization at the ward level, the Elders Quorum, this quorum leadership now has been given a primary responsibility in the ward for leading in these specific higher priesthood efforts (see D & C 84:19-20).  We see in this move by the Church to create important Melchizedek priesthood function councils at the ward level (and perhaps also the stake and area levels) a replication of the apostolic Executive Committees for such things as Temple and Family History and for Missionary Work at the general church level.  And perhaps the most major change of all is the elevation of the Relief Society Presidency to near equal responsibility and joint leadership status with the Elders Presidency for these ward level efforts.  The risk in the lack of these new understandings may well be fragmentation of ward efforts in these areas, or failure to give sufficient attention or emphasis to this work, both of which would seem to weaken the effort of the ward in these areas.  There is an interconnectedness of responsibilities that seems to require a broad consensus in order for members to successfully carry out goals, policies, and procedures in the local levels of the Church.
    To optimize the temple and family history work in a ward, it would seem helpful for the following to be on the same page:
    –The Elders President and his designated Counselor
    –The Relief Society President and her designated Counselor
    –The Ward Temple and Family History Leader
    And to a lesser degree (but still vital):
    –Family History Consultants and members of the ward temple and family history committee
    –Members of the Ward Council, including the bishopric and also youth leaders.
    Another challenge to consider is how a ward temple and family history leader should operate in this context.  The Handbook of Instructions identifies an individual ward calling of a Temple and Family History Leader.  This assignment  may be filled by a counselor in the Elders Quorum Presidency or another Melchizedek Priesthood holder.  Four persons are involved in the decision as to whom to call to that position.  According to the Church Handbook of Instructions, the Bishop and Stake President determine which option to follow (Elders counselor or other person), and also the Elders and Relief Society Presidents are to give input as the individual to be called.  The call is to be issued by a member of the bishopric and sustained in Sacrament meeting, and the setting apart performed by a member of the Bishopric.  Even though this is a ward leadership calling, the immediate supervision of this Temple and Family History Leader is by the Elders Quorum and Relief Society presidencies and particularly the Elders Counselor assigned to “help lead temple and family history in the ward” (Handbook 8.2.2, 8.2.4, 9.2.4).  I might suggest that a reason for the call of this person by the Bishopric rather than it being a call within the Elders Quorum is that the work cuts across the major responsibilities of two ward organizations, Elders and Relief Society.  
    When this calling is made, it seems critical that the individual must be clearly informed and understand the requirement for him to accept his primary supervision to be from the Elders and Relief Society Presidencies and to promote his directing of the work through them.  If he or others assume that he answers organizationally to the person issuing the call or any other individual who is not a part of the Elders or Relief Society presidencies, the needed unity and cooperation for this work within the ward will likely suffer.  Also, as holding a significant Melchizedek Priesthhood calling, it goes without saying that the ward temple and family history leader should not carry other assignments that interfere with his being present in Elders Quorum meetings regularly to teach and promote his special mission.  Also the efforts of a ward temple and family history leader will probably work best and reflect the leadership of the Relief Society and Elders Quorum if he is included regularly in correlation meetings of these two presidencies, especially prior to his scheduled appearances with the Ward Council, in order to be able to present a well-considered and united position to the rest of the ward leaders.   
    We are seeing a number of persons with temple and family history leader callings functioning largely in isolation.  Sometimes these persons may make the choice to operate in isolation or unilaterally.  Unilateral actions by a person who is in such a directing role is inconsistent with the order of the Church, and in the long run will not get the job done because success requires the commitment of many persons acting unitedly.  This is particularly the case if the temple and family history leader in a ward does not want to take direction from or seek intense involvement of the Elders Quorum and Relief Society leadership as being his supervising authorities.
    A second reason for this isolation of the temple and family history leader may result from a lack of understanding or training of either the temple and family history leader and/or of the leaders of the Elders Quorum or Relief Society, so that they do not understand or are indifferent to their important shared responsibilities in the ward for providing leadership for temple and family history work or are holding on to “the old way of doing things”.
    Here are some added suggestions that might help in overcoming these problems.


1. Calling of a new ward temple and family history leader
    The person issuing the call should make it very clear that the new leader knows that in this calling he needs to support and represent the Elders Quorum and Relief Society Presidencies as they are asked to “lead the day to day temple and family history efforts in the ward” (Handbook 25.2.2) and that his immediate file leader is a specified Elders Quorum Counselor.  Some individuals have suggested that the Elders President (and even the Relief Society President) attend these calling interviews and be the person(s) to provide instruction on the duties and organizational relationships for the new assignment.  Or alternatively, to schedule and hold a separate meeting with the four of them and the new leader, to discuss how it works and to "hand off" the Temple and Family History leader to the EQ and RS presidents (or counselors).

2. Oversight of ward Elders Quorums and Relief Society Presidencies
    The problem of a lack of Elders Quorum leadership for temple and family history work might be cured by focused attention to this potential problem by members of the Stake High Council who are assigned to oversee and support the specific ward Elders quorum presidencies (Handbook 25.3.3)
    – Training Elders Quorum Presidencies on their roles and responsibilities for temple and family history work
    – More specific training for the Quorum counselor who is assigned to temple and family history work (especially where some other man is the temple and family history chair).
    –Specific suggestions as to how the presidency could involve a ward temple and family history leader in their discussions and planning, how to structure regular correlational meetings and contacts with the leader and how to use quorum meetings and resources to promote temple and family history work.  
    The Stake Relief Society Presidency might fill a similar oversight and training role with ward Relief Society leaders (Handbook 25.3.4)
    The High Councilors and Stake Relief Society leaders might be assisted in this by stake temple and family history consultants, who are part of a stake committee on temple and family history work (Handbook 25.3.5)
    Another approach to training that has been used successfully by some stakes is for the stake temple and family history leadership persons to schedule a monthly training time, in this case on a Sunday afternoon once a month, at the local FamilySearch Center, inviting all the ward temple and family history leaders, ward consultants, and members of ward temple and family history committees to attend.  These meetings might present a mix of formal family history research training and discussion of problems and ideas for organizing and promoting this work in the wards and stake.  This might provide an alternative (or supplement) to the correlation meeting suggested below in item 4, plus have the added benefit of familiarizing all these persons with the local Center and its resources.

3. Creation of a stake temple and family history committee with persons of specific expertise in this work
    These persons might be deployed to help with training of ward Elders Quorum and Relief Society Presidencies, Temple and Family History Leaders, and Temple and Family History Consultants.  This committee might also focus on integrating and the optimal use of family history resources of the wards, the stake and the local FamilySearch Center.

4. Stake High Councilor Over Temple and Family History Work Correlation Meeting with Ward Temple and Family History Work Leaders
    It has been suggested that coordination and commitment to temple and family history work, on the part of both ward and of stake leaders, might be facilitated by the High Councilor over temple and family history work holding a meeting periodically, perhaps every three to six months, with the ward temple and family history chairmen.  Purposes would include providing information on stake initiatives and other resources, receiving feedback and considering solutions to temple and family history issues and problems, and to train and motivate these leaders, etc.
    The High Councilor should seek specific information about:
    –What is the nature of the working relationships that exist in the wards between the temple and family history leaders and their ward Elders quorum and Relief Society leadership?
    –Are the ward temple and family history committees fully staffed and meeting regularly, probably monthly?
    –Do the wards each have a temple and family history plan that it is following conscientiously?  Do these plans include actions to be carried out by all ward functions, including the Young Men, the Young Women, Primary, and representing a broad consensus and commitment across the entire ward?
    –Are there enough consultants in the wards?  Do they need more training?  Does the ward meet its assignment for consultants serving with the local FamilySearch Center?
    –Are the formal resources for training consultants adequate and being utilized?
    –Is the ward making effective use of the local FamilySearch Center resources?

5. For all temple and family history callings, ward, stake, and FamilySearch Center workers
    The feelings of isolation reported by some workers might be partly alleviated if when called, the leader emphasizes the interrelatedness of all the family history resources, in the ward, stake and FamilySearch Center.  Ward calls might direct the recipient to stake and Center for training, and potentially to their support of Center activities and staffing needs.
    
REL: rev. May 20, 2024

Established, Rooted, Grounded, and Settled– Supporting Scriptures for the Lewis Family Creed

    The original Lewis Family Creed in full form: Raise up the foundation of many generations. We seek successive generations of grandparents, parents, and children who are grounded, rooted, settled, and established (Ephesians 3:16-19) in the Gospel of Jesus Christ and sealed in His Holy Temple.
    Shorter version: We seek successive generations of grandparents, parents, and children who are grounded in the Gospel of Jesus Christ and sealed in His Holy Temple

24 We ask thee, Holy Father, to establish the people that shall worship, and honorably hold a name and standing in this thy house, to all generations and for eternity; (D&C 109:24)

16 That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man;
17 That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,  (Ephesians 3:16-17)

22 In the body of his flesh through death, to present you holy and unblameable and unreproveable in his sight:
23 If ye continue in the faith grounded and settled, and be not moved away from the hope of the gospel, which ye have heard, and which was preached to every creature which is under heaven; whereof I Paul am made a minister; (Colossians 1:22-23)

6 As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him:
7 Rooted and built up in him, and stablished in the faith, as ye have been taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving. (Colossians 2:6-7)

12 And the Lord make you to increase and abound in love one toward another, and toward all men, even as we do toward you:
13 To the end he may stablish your hearts unblameable in holiness before God, even our Father, at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ with all his saints. (1 Thessalonians 3:12-13)

16 Now our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God, even our Father, which hath loved us, and hath given us everlasting consolation and good hope through grace,
17 Comfort your hearts, and stablish you in every good word and work. (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17)

10 But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you. (1 Peter 5:10)

Recording oral history interviews

     There is a wealth of insights available in the experiences and memories of older family members, that will evaporate when they are dead.  Performing and recording oral interviews can provide wonderful family history records.  Young persons may be especially adept at doing oral history interviews.
    Preparation:
1. Find a set of oral history questions that will be appropriate.  Attached are some possible sets of oral interview questions.  There are a number of web sites and books that suggest additional options.  You may also write and add your own questions.  When interviewing, be prepared to ask more detailed questions that occur to you as a discussion goes forward.
2. Obtain audio recording equipment with the possibility of recording at least a one hour interview.
3. Plan to transcribe the interview and also save the recording, to preserve the voice of the interviewee.  There are free on-line tools that can assist with the transcription.

Family Connection to New Movie Hero

    Wendy and I were thrilled and inspired by the new movie “Escape from Germany,” and were especially touched by the fact that we are relatively close relatives of the missionary hero of the film, Norman Seibold (FS ID: KWCB-J56).  We learned in the movie that his wife was Ruby Davenport (FS ID: KWZM-7XP).  She and I are 2nd cousins once removed, both descended from Edward Wilcox Davenport and his wife Clarissa Crapo.  They were married in the Salt Lake Temple,  9 February 1940, the parents of 6 children, and lived in Southern Idaho.
    Death announcement “Mormon Hero”
    “Norman Seibold, who helped his fellow Mormon missionaries leave Germany in 1939 as the Nazi threat grew, died Friday. He was 88.
    “As the Nazis were setting their sights on Poland, Seibold decided to find the stranded missionaries in Germany and get them out.
    “Seibold went to train stations and employed a common signal, whistling the first five notes of the Mormon hymn, "Do What Is Right."
    “Any missionaries on hand would gather around him. In five days he rounded up all 85 in the country and evacuated them.
    “In 1956, Seibold moved to Rupert, ID, where he managed Imperial Produce Co. From 1962 to 1982, he managed the Minidoka Stake Welfare Farm, and from 1983 to 1995, he was a Minidoka County commissioner.” (Grand Rapids Press, The (MI)/4 December 2003)
    Here is an excerpt about their life from my Aunt Dorothy’s Davenports Ancestry in America, written by Ruby herself (pp. 154-155).
    “Late in the year 1939 I met Norman Seibold, a recently returned missionary who had come to Parker to operate a grocery store.
    “Norman and his parents moved to Newdale soon after his birth and his father established a grocery business. After attending Ricks College, he graduated from the University of Utah in business and accounting. He was all-conference guard for two years while playing football for the U. of U. After graduation he filled a mission in West Germany.
    “A few months after our marriage we moved to Idaho Falls where Norman operated a meat market in one of the grocery stores. Then, during the war years we lived in Newdale where my husband was engaged in farming. Later we lived in the Idaho Falls area where he managed different meat markets.
    “In the spring of 1950 we bought a grocery store in St. Anthony which we operated for six years. During that time one of our newborn babies died of virus pneumonia when she was just two days old.
    “In 1956 we moved to Rupert where Norman went to work for Imperial Produce Co., managing their potato shipping plant and farming operations. This is where he is employed at the present time (1962)”.

A Shout-out to the Mothers and Fathers in our Family

    We have just passed the time each year when we celebrate good motherhood and good fatherhood.  So I say “A big positive shout-out, my praise and thanks, to the magnificent mothers and fathers in our Lewis family.”  You are doing so very well in establishing and maintaining strong, loving and united homes in which our family members thrive, feel the bonds of love and their own exceptional worth and value, and are inspired to achieve their highest potential.
    In a recent article by Jenet Erickson, she notes “If we were asked to design a system for making sure that children’s... needs were met, we would probably come up with something quite similar to the two-parent ideal... [There is]...something powerful in the design—mother and father—devoted to something larger than themselves, nurturing the children their love brought into being... The ideal context for [their] development was a married mother and father parenting together.”
    I loved Jenet’s detailed description of a mother-infant relation and of the relative differences in the mothering and fathering relationships with the children:
    “I recently sat beside a new mother. Her infant, just six weeks old, was still struggling to nurse and bottle-feed. His utter dependence struck me. He gazed directly into his mother’s face, locking his eyes on hers. In spite of seeming to have literally no real capacities, it was clear that he recognized her. She was his entire world. For a second, his mouth broke into a smile, and I watched her exhaustion give way to radiance.
    “Like all infants, his primary task was to search out a face—wired to seek the one whose heartbeat and smell and voice he already intimately knew, whose blood and organs and bones built his. His fetal cells will circulate in her body long after he has grown into adulthood. The bond they were primed to form is an intuitive extension of their biological connection.  
    “For the next year of his life, they will communicate through emotions, eye to eye, body to body. She will regulate his inner world by intuitively synchronizing herself with his inner state, then upregulating the emotion, doing what he cannot yet do for himself. In the process, their bond of emotional communication will lay the foundations for his emotional awareness, personality, self-regulation, and capacity for intimacy.
    “He will also connect with Dad, especially as he becomes a toddler. Their bond will look different, more playful, and physical. When Mom holds a ball in front of him, she might describe its color and shape; when Dad takes it, he is more likely to play with it, maybe even bop him on the head with it. Mom and Dad will do much of the same things—nurture, guide, teach, feed—but they will also offer distinct orientations. Dad will be more likely to encourage independence and risk taking; Mom more likely to build assurance and emotional understanding, the one he will go to for comfort. She’ll likely correct his behavior more often, but when Dad corrects, he will hold the line, enforcing boundaries and communicating authority. Dad is the one he will rough house with while he learns how to handle strong emotions and relate to others in regulated ways. But Mom is likely the one he will want to talk to about his day.
    “Together, they will offer him a fuller and more complete understanding of himself and the world and how he can navigate its complexity with assurance and capacity. When he calls out “Dad,” the voice that responds will assure him that needed protection, guidance, and help are close. His call for “Mom” will bring a different, also essential, form of soul-nourishing protection, help, and guidance.
    “There is something irreplaceable in this complementary design...”
(“How Parents and Children Benefit from Fidelity to One Another,” Jenet Erickson, PublicSquare Magazine, June 12, 2024, https://publicsquaremag.org)
    I have written more about the nature and importance of the father-child relationship  (See Chapter 18 “Some thoughts about Male-Female Marital Roles and Relationships” in The Higher Law, the Temple, and Families, pp 109-121).  For additional study, I also strongly recommend a pair of chapters in Bruce Hafen’s book Covenant Hearts, #18 The Moral Influence of Women, and #19 The Moral Influence of Men.  
    God bless you all. 

Binding Persons to a Large Organization--Strategies for a Ward

     How can we best help individual persons people feel a part of a large organization, to bind them or give them a sense of belonging to that organization, particularly if that organization is new to them or they initially do not feel part of it?  Some psychologists have taught that this happens best as persons build a number of close individual relationships with other persons in that organization and that this relationship building happens best in small intimate group settings or one on one interactions that occur in connection with or sponsored by the larger organization.
    How might this insight apply in connection with feelings about our own wards in the Church of Jesus Christ?  This might especially be of concern when people move to a new residence, or if persons are naturally shy or reserved, or we have major ward boundary changes, or for persons who are relatively “less active” in the Church, or not even members of the Church but live in Utah neighborhoods.  This emotional connectivity seems to occur naturally and progressively over time for persons who serve in Church presidencies, bishoprics, and other small leadership groups, and perhaps also when effective ministering exists and when interviews with Church leaders are experienced regularly.  But the question still remains for many–what can we do further to help facilitate other persons in our ward area in forming these friendships and close relationships with many more people and thus contribute to their greater feelings of attachment to the ward and the Church?  Specifically, what are ways a ward could structure small group gatherings that facilitate the forming of more of these closer relationships and thus bind ward members more closely to the ward and by extension, the Church and also their Savior?
    Here are some ideas:
– Plan small neighborhood street parties/breakfasts/barbecues (best at a sub-ward level, perhaps 12-15 homes at most)
– Organize small (3-4 couples max) temple (endowment or sealing) groups, with dessert at someone’s home after, (with an expectation of rotating group members on a schedule).
– Create small dinner (including games or visiting time) groups (3 or 4 couples), who rotate perhaps monthly hosting at each of the member homes (also group membership changed often, perhaps after one or two rotations).
– Organize family history writing/FS memories group (4 or 5 persons) small, who share/report their writings and records about their own family.
– Organize church-house cleaning groups
– Organize neighborhood service groups (yard clean-up, assist move-ins and move-outs, help elderly/widows/handicapped, cannery assignments)
– Call/assign Relief Society/Elders Quorum Activities Committees (4 or 5 persons each).  In their work, they could sponsor both ward wide events, but also promote activities of interest to smaller subsets, and be the organizers/assigners of participants and lead persons for these small group activities.  Here are some small subset group possibilities: health and exercise groups (walking, jogging, swimming, aerobics, weight-loss), sports and recreation (basketball shooting, pickleball, attending BYU games together, fishing, camping), young mothers’ group (sewing, meal planning, family finances, playground visits), book reading, classic movies, gardening, quilting.
    Possible references to committees and small working groups in Handbook:
Missionary coordination 23.4    8.2.3
Temple and family history coordination 25.2.7   25.2.2
Young single adults support 14.1.2.2
Activities   RS 9.2.1.3      EQ 8.2.1.3    Ward 20.2.1
Young women preparation for RS 9.4
Teaching prospective Elders    8.4
Service to people in need   9.2.2.2   9.3.4   22.6.2    8.3.5   8.2.2.2