Bless my dad

I was reminded, as some people talked about their fathers in our Sunday School class today, of an area for which I have great appreciation for my Dad. I suppose that it may also have blessed my children.

My Dad did not have an ideal relationship with his father, although he supported him and worked with him after he reached adulthood. At one time Daddy said that his father's philosophy of rearing boys was that you have to "break their spirit" like some people break horses to ride. As the oldest boy he was often the target of rather severe physical punishment, including whippings with a belt. There was a day, when he was about 16 years old, when he was working with his father on their Glenwood farm. His father became angry at him for some reason and said, “Come here, boy. I am going to whup you” and started to remove his belt The normal pattern was for Daddy to obey and get his punishment. Daddy reported that the thought came to him that he was could outrun his father and that he was bigger and stronger and in better physical condition. Normally not combative, he looked at his father and said, “You touch me and I’ll kill you.” Daddy reported that my Grandfather never touched him again. He thought that things became better for his younger brothers, Harold and Russell, also.

We have come to learn that abuse of children seems to run in families, and people often repeat the patterns of their parents with their own children. My Dad resolved, and never broke this resolve, to totally avoid the use of physical punishment with his own children. I am eternally grateful for his love and strength of will to be able break this cycle of abusive parenting and to pass to his children a more constructive pattern of child-rearing.